Went to a meeting Friday nite and I left sad by the questions by long-timers, my judgementalism as usual…..I don’t know how to do it why do I think them honestly asking questions is bad??

I left w/a gal who was so excited to see a movement……a gal burned by church and people, be fired up about a room full of people who wanted to bring others to Christ, to relationships that will fuel fires of love and service.

It was quite surprising and amazing really the perspective differences...like I said humbling and amazing.

I remember the first time you empowered me Roy to listen for/HEAR His voice…the Holy Spirit and I can’t wait to do that with more and more people yearning deeply to become followers of Christ, not leaders maybe of Small Groups ( I know can you believe I said that) but in the context of sitting in living rooms or board rooms learning together to HEAR His voice. And I have so much to learn……..

Matthew 13: ^11-15He replied, "You've been given insight into God's kingdom. You know how it works. Not everybody has this gift, this insight; it hasn't been given to them. Whenever someone has a ready heart for this, the insights and understandings flow freely. But if there is no readiness, any trace of receptivity soon disappears. That's why I tell stories: to create readiness, to nudge the people toward receptive insight. In their present state they can stare till doomsday and not see it, listen till they're blue in the face and not get it. I don't want Isaiah's forecast repeated all over again:

Your ears are open but you don't hear a thing.
Your eyes are awake but you don't see a thing.
The people are blockheads!
They stick their fingers in their ears
so they won't have to listen;
They screw their eyes shut
so they won't have to look,
so they won't have to deal with me face-to-face
and let me heal them.

^16-17"But you have God-blessed eyes—eyes that see! And God-blessed ears—ears that hear! A lot of people, prophets and humble believers among them, would have given anything to see what you are seeing, to hear what you are hearing, but never had the chance.

And then this morning reading Matthew 13…gifted in Faith… ½ I and ½ S filled w/optimism in addition to the gift of FAITH….I was THANKING Him for that gift for the blessing of believing and reading everyday learning more and more about Him and I don’t want to tell my story?? to say how many years it’s been of failing….of how I didn’t know what I was talking about, about judging them for not coming or not reading the book or…..whatever else I used to measure them and their growth, oh yeah my failure was about their growth and meanwhile He was about teaching me to grow…humbling me to loving them. I don’t know if this makes sense or fits but to all of you who have discipled me…how can I NOT desire to disciple others to be a part of a MOVEMENT to see more and more come to relationship w/Him…..