Job 9-10; Acts 13-14

I have a messy brain and just hope my heart being as messy that both are centered and focused on You and Your will......took (whether it was given or not) a criticism last nite and don't want to ignore the truth of it and yet not just run away from being messy. This on the heels of being told or observed about me that I have an easy life. I do Abba and I make it hard or noone knows anothers struggles?? Is messy a forgivable sin, does it take away from any giftedness You might have given me? My need for order is so neglible is that wrong? Am I lying to myself, in wanting my own way all the time do I simply run away from order?? All these questions from a back handed comment, what do I DO now Abba.

I read about Job and wonder....how would I react? If this ease of life weren't so? Job asking You Why and answering himself w/wonder at who You are that he can even ask. And him without the forgiveness of Christ, under the law...without Your Spirit? I don't know and in the mess of my brain I don't care, the mystery of who You ARE, have been and always will be draws me deeper and deeper into Your care...that's it isn't it, not deeper and deeper into myself but into YOUR CARE and why do You love us THAT much and how can I give this knowing away?? I can't , I can only live it, in it...deeply deeply in it and DRENCHED with Your Grace keep on trying, stumbling, falling, failing and trying.

Acts 13:39 -43 Through him everyone who believes is justified from everything you could not be justified from by the law of Moses. Take care that what the prophets have said does not happen to you;
"Look you scoffers, wonder and perish,
for I am going to do something in your days
that you would never believe, even if someone told you."
As Paul and Barnabus were leaving the synagogue, the people invited them to speak further about these things on the next Sabbath. When the congregation was dismissed, many of the Jews and devout converts to Judaism followed Paul and Barnabus who talked with them and urged them to continue in the grace of God.

Paul and Barnabus persecuted then leave......52 And the disciples were filled with joy and with the Holy Spirit.....joy listed first.....persecuted and filled w/joy.....and then knowing I believe it's the next chapter they have a disagreement and seperate....but here, partnering in and under harsh circumstances filled w/Joy.... and we can do that now and model that, give proof, not proof...evidence(?) of who You are...talking with people and urging them to journey's of incredible....journey's You have for them.