Esther 9 & 10; Luke 19

To be going to South Africa tomorrow is beyond anything I ever dreamed happening.....to be going on a Mission Trip is like a dream come true.....
I remember coming to Christ and thinking.... that's what it meant...I WOULD be going somewhere and then quickly realizing NOT and NOW I am....it's just beyond my grasp of understanding and blowing me away in it's amazingness....
Dan, the man who was never going to go OUT of this country flying 22 hours to South Africa...
Dan who I laid my hand on his heart and prayed for YOU to enter his heart...so soft and relational, so seeking You and Your will.....so loving and kind and amazing....
Dan and I going to South Africa...I am so grateful Abba......I am so blessed.....
I want to shout from the rooftops how awed I am...frightened and full on scared and ......awed....
really bottom line flat out scared out of my wits....wondering what I will DO when I get there, how I will find a purpose....wondering how much of a fool I will make of myself in being so incapable and awkward.....scared and excited and afraid I'm just going to spend the whole time teary and awkward....what the hell??? I am going to South Africa please pray for me, for us, for His will to be done whatever that is.......

The whole of Luke this morning but this: 41-44 When the city came into view, he wept over it. "If you had only recognized this day, and everything that was good for you! But now it's too late. In the days ahead your enemies are going to bring up their heavy artillery and surround you, pressing in from every side. They'll smash you and your babies on the pavement. Not one stone will be left intact. All this because you didn't recognize and welcome God's personal visit." .....to love and lead people to You.....follow You so closely that the scent of You draws them....That's a dream Abba....for here....for there...to follow You so closely and the fear is....I haven't......I won't....whatever it takes Abba to follow wherever You lead.....