Revelation 10-14

It was such a fun nite, sure, for me some deep conversation would have been the icing on the cake but that's me and it was a nite to celebrate our kids for the holidays and while there is a piece of me feeling irresponsible and kind of yucky for the money spent, it's probably a nite never to be replicated so want to simply enjoy it for what it was. And Abba I am grateful for them in my/our lives. Thank you you blessed us w/kids and that they each have spouses and that all are on journey's, all working at figuring out how to live loving Jesus is just such joy...thank you.

There is so much visualization in Revelations, so little I understand and then wonder if i am supposed to and where is my heart hard that I can't...12 : ¹¹ And our brothers and sisters defeated him
by the blood of the Lamb's death
and by the message they preached.
They did not love their lives so much
that they were afraid of death.
I get this verse, I hear it. I'm not sure I live it, I want to....not loving this life so much so as to not be afraid of anything that might get in the way of the message......got good neighbors, cool young folks that I so want to see in heaven...i don't know how to ask, I worry too much about being weird....i am weird i don't know why that label keeps me from moving.....it seems like the most loving thing to be would be to ask and invite but i don't know whether that is simply my truth??

surrendered
submitted
yield...yielded..yielding

all words that used to mean being constricted and now there is freedom....and I don't know how I just know it happened, is happening....

help me Abba to live yielded and free so that others may come to know You....to not love my life so much, caring what they think and miss sharing with them Your message....yielded to Your timing