Matthew 9

Matthew 9:20 Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak. 21 She said to herself, "If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed."
22 Jesus turned and saw her. "Take heart, daughter," he said, "your faith has healed you." And the woman was healed from that moment.
Mark 5: 27 When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, 28because she thought, "If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed." 29Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.
30 At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, "Who touched my clothes?"
Luke 8: 43 And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years,[d] but no one could heal her. 44She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped.
45"Who touched me?" Jesus asked.

In Matthew’s telling he was close enough to Jesus that he saw him turn and see the woman. At first I was struck with the differences in the telling….that Mark and Luke tell it that Jesus ‘asks’… but then in thinking about it perhaps Matthews conversion was fresher? Perhaps his forgiveness was still driving him, that Jesus took him a tax collector and added him to his group of disciples, he was still awed by it and stuck closer to Jesus??
Just conjecture on my part I know but in this last or most recent past, feeling a freedom in Christ I don’t want to lose it. I hear people say they used to feel it….they want the innocence of faith…they think God has turned away from them and I guess I am scared.
I don’t want it to leave, I don’t want to be bound up in Becky, in fear. I want to keep this feeling of YOUR closeness. So maybe that’s it. I have to keep You and not Your miracles as the focus of my life. Romans 1 the other day….25 They traded the truth about God for a lie. So they worshiped and served the things God created instead of the Creator himself, who is worthy of eternal praise! Amen.

I have to keep remembering all that You’ve forgiven me to forgive and live aware and sensitive to….
to what, I don’t know.
Just struck this morning with wanting to live always in an awareness of You. Not demanding MORE of You but …
but what I don’t know…